I didn't post any pictures or keep a journal from when I was pregnant. I really wish that I had. So while I still can, and while it's as fresh as it will ever be in my memory I'm going to organize and post them. Here goes.
I found out I was pregnant around Christmas while we were in Japan. I was getting nauseous and really tired at work AND different foods were starting to make me feel sick! But I never, not once, threw up my whole pregnancy. The only time I threw up was while I was in labor. On the way home from work one night I bought a test. Everything was in Japanese but I could understand some of the directions. You pee on the stick, let it sit for 2 or 3 minutes and then you are given the result.
Unfortunately the result is in Japanese. But this didn't occur to me until AFTER I had peed on it. Tim had just returned that morning from Australia and was in the kitchen cooking dinner. I didn't tell him that I was taking a test, but he already knew that I was a little worried about being knocked up. I was so nervous! After 10 minutes I told him, "Honey, I took a test today." Him - "What did it say?" Me- "I don't know." Him - "Why don't you know?" Me- "I just took it, it's still in the bathroom I haven't checked it yet. Will you check it?" So Tim went in and read the result. Luckily some of the result was written in Hiragana. We found out that I was in fact pregnant.
We didn't say anything. We sat at the kitchen table lost in thought pushing our dinner around on our plates.
At the time I remember that I felt fear more than anything else. Would I be a good mom? What would my family say? What does the future hold for me? For us? I was afraid. I wasn't sad or disappointed but I can't say that I was ecstatic (at first) at the news. Tim assured me that we'd be okay and that we were going to stick together and after hearing that I felt better. Less fear. I was still worried about what we'd tell my family. He hadn't met my parents yet. We were also worried about telling his family so we decided to wait until after the first trimester. I had to change my lifestyle drastically to help my baby grow but I was happy to do it. It was a little hard when everyone was partying over Christmas and New Years and it got a little boring but of course I don't regret it! Tim accidentally hinted to all of his friends at a Christmas party that I was pregnant and over new years everyone was suspicious and watching to see how we behaved. We went snowboarding for New Years and I made sure to be extra careful not to fall. We ended up telling Lu and JP and they were really happy for us.
Work was fun and my contract was winding down to its end. I had a lot less energy and grew tired before work was over. I couldn't stay out or stay up late anymore. The girls I worked with were the first to find out the results after Timmy found out. I took my pee stick to work and showed it to Mio and Tiare just to make sure that it was a positive result. Hahaha!
Tim and I flew to Australia at the end of my contract. I was tired all the time and strong stink smells made me nauseous. I didn't want to do NOTHING. Hahaha Anything. Tim turned into a Nazi and made sure I ate all the right things and didn't eat any of the wrong things. I got to meet a lot of his close friends for the first time and I'm sure I gave them a bad impression because the whole time we were hanging out I wanted to sleep and I couldn't stop myself from yawning. Tim's cousins were suspicious about it all but we couldn't tell them until AFTER we told his parents and we had already decided to wait until the end of the first trimester. We ended up telling Matt (Tim's brother and best friend) and he was so happy for us. He also agreed we should wait to tell our parents. We visited Tim's doctor and took another prego test to make sure and he said I was, "very pregnant." Usually the test takes a few minutes until you can see the result but he said right away that the result showed up!
I'm a procrastinator. We had our first appointment on Feb 9. The picture below was after our first doctors appointment. I'm not trying to show off. I just want to be able to remember that at one point in my life I used to be skinny(ish). Who knows if I will ever be that size again... And I want my son, and husband to know... I sacrificed my body for you! Hahaha but I don't regret it. No not one bit.
It was February 9, 2011. They told me I was 12 wks prego and we got to listen to our baby's heartbeat for the first time. It really is the most beautiful sound in the world. Sometimes when he's sleeping I put my head near his chest to listen to it and I remember the first time I heard it. It was in that moment, I feel, I became a mother. In his tiny, perfect, healthy heartbeat I began to feel the love that only a mother feels. Since then it has grown more everyday, it has no limits and knows no end and no beginning because it has always been inside me, I just didn't know it yet.
So then, after the appointment, we went into waikiki, parked at the zoo, took the above picture and had a little surf to celebrate. At night when we got home I wrote a little poem about our little baby's heartbeat. I posted it on the blog, "
Your Heart" but tried to keep it as vague as possible since we weren't putting it out there yet that I was pregnant. I hadn't told my parents yet and I was really scared to tell them too. For obvious reasons if you know me and my family.
The end of a new day and new love. 2.9.11
This was our first ultra sound. We had it a few days after our first checkup on Feb 14, VALENTINES DAY! I was shocked and amazed to see that the little person inside me was already so developed! I didn't expect to see the form of a little person but there he was. My beautiful little love.
It was around this time, maybe earlier than this that we decided we would give our baby bump a nickname. I really liked calling it my little "nugget." That stuck and we ended up calling him NUGGIE.
Tim was supposed to leave that week for New York and we were debating about how and when we were going to tell my parents that I was pregnant. It wasn't easy but we sat down together and told them together. My mom already knew because of her special intuition. She said she could tell because I was glowing. She actually approached me about it a week before we sat down with my dad. It was hard and my dad was really sad but he said the important thing was to take care of my health and the baby's health and "move forward." I love my parents for their love and support. I'm so lucky.
A few days later Tim left to New York to play rugby and to do some networking. The original plan was that I would go with him, but I decided to stay in Hawaii where I could get on Med-quest and have insurance. I met up with him in Florida then flew to NYC with him. In Florida I started getting really itchy all day long. It was terrible! I thought it was because of the pregnancy. But I finally figured out that it was because of a bug bite. I tried to walk through some bushes in the early twilight because I didn't want to walk around the gate to get back to my girlfriend Jeneka's appartment. Bad idea! Bugs, snakes and who knows what else live in the bushes! Duh! I should've realized I wasn't in Hawaii and that the bushes are more dangerous in FL. Haha. I loved being with my sweetheart but I HATED New York. It stunk and there were people smoking everywhere and I didn't feel safe. Tim lived in an apartment on a really busy one way street. At the end of his street there were several fire stations and hospitals. We were hearing sirens all day and all night and there were people hanging out on the street fighting and yelling at all hours. I think I would've appreciated NYC more if it wasn't so frickin cold and if I wasn't pregnant. I spent a lot of days lying inside watching desperate housewives on netflix. I did get to go to 3 musicals on Broadway Memphis, La Cage, and my favorite Mary Poppins!!! It was the most beautiful, magical, special play. We had a good 3 weeks together and then I had to go home and we were apart for a month.
I was visiting the Kapiolani Women's Outpatient clinic. I didn't realize how the healthcare system worked so I kept visiting the clinic and seeing several different doctors. They were all nice, but no one remembered me or knew who I was. I took me a long time to figure out I could switch doctors. I really wanted a more personal experience. My appointments were short. I gave a sample of shishi each time and the doctors answered questions we had. My favorite part about those appointments were listening to Nainoa's heart. I really looked forward to all of my appointments because in between those appointments I would wonder about my baby and hope that he was ok and growing well.
On March 30 we had an ultra sound to find out the baby's sex. Tim was away in NY so my girlfriends Crimson, Kiele, and Kei came with me. My ultra sound tech wasn't very friendly and wouldn't let everyone come in at once. We were so excited and Tim was so happy when he found out we were going to have a BOY!
Poor little guy was getting his face smashed by the placenta.
To be continued in Part II....
I forgot that last week Saturday we went to the FOOD FEST on campus at BYU. It was so much fun! We took my nephews, Kamani, Tuto, and Maihe along with us and we had a blast! I love being an Aunty! I had so much fun watching them go on the kiddie rides. I felt like I was doing it again as a child.
